Sunday, December 20, 2009

can you hear me major tom?

i have been abducted by aliens.
i am on board a space craft and encased in a tube.
i have a 'probe' of some sort.
it doesn't hurt.
they extract information and data without me feeling a thing.
the aliens checked out blogs as part of their 'study' of earthlings.
i saw them sneering at mine, looking at each other with their hideous one eye and then back at me with disdain.
they slither away for an hour or so every day to sleep or eat or abduct more unsuspecting people.
i'm not sure.
i unhooked my probe.
it took me about 4 hours.
i've managed to figure out their eleaborate labyrinth of computers.
it wasn't easy.
strange keyboards and all that.
but i was able to log in briefly.
just wanted to let you know i'm still here.
i know people are wondering why i haven't posted for a few weeks.

they say they will let me go soon.
and apparently no one will even know i've ever been gone.
this happens regularly i've learned.
before they erase my memory.
i want YOU to know.

it could happen to you too.


A Woman Of No Importance said...

Yikes, Clipstress! Can we send parcels, or something??!

Take care xox

Stephanie Faris said...

Sounds like me...even aboard a spaceship, I'd try to find a way to get online.

ChiTown Girl said...

Sheesh, I've been wondering where you were! I miss you, Bloggy Buddy! Have a wonderful holiday!

karen gerstenberger said...

I miss your posts, but I understand! Merry Christmas! XO

Molly Potter said...

That happened to me a few years back. I think all my memories since have been fabricated by aliens because I find it hard to believe some of them are real.

Try bribery. Aliens like chocolate, huge underpants and green shampoo. they might set you free then so you can enjoy human Christmas.

Gypsy said...

That must be where I've been though they obviously erased my memory before I could let anyone know. You were probed? I wondered what that hole near my belly button was.

Can you ask them if I left my purse on their space ship because I can't seem to find it anywhere?

Granny on the Web said...

Shall we form the cavalry and come a rescue you?
A whole bummer if you are there for Christmas!

Love Granny

Busy Bee Suz said...

You are so funny. I hate those one eyed Aliens.
They tried to get me, but I was too sassy to them and they let me go free.

Clippy Mat said...

Fhina: I don't know where you'd address the parcels TO unfortunately. I'm not sure where exactly I am. ???
not that unusual for me at this time of year really. ;-)

Stephanie: Where there's a will there's a way! ;-)

Chi-chi: hopefully I will be back before Christmas. The aliens are putting up THEIR tree as we speak. (it's all slimy.)

Karen: thanks for understanding. alien abductions are often a cause for a breakdown in relationships so i've learned. good to know you are standing by me. :-)

i just happen to have a huge pair of underpants on me. i'll give it a try. thanks. :-)

gypsy: there's a few handbags lying around actually. i've got my eye on a LV. what colour was yours?

Granny: lay low and don't approach. they will take you too and try to have their evil way with you as well.

Suz: hah! that's what they want you to think. Your picture is up here over the recycling box, AND you left your flip-flops behind.

Gill - That British Woman said...

very confused by this post of yours?


Pam said...

Crikey! I did wonder where you were and thought you might be partying in Vegas but I never considered abduction! Watch out for that probe and try to have a Merry Christmas. XXX

Clippy Mat said...

you're not the only one! ;-)

It looks a little bit like Vegas actually. :-)

Molly Potter said...

So have you tried giving the aliens your underpants? Perhaps they are Frockfrix and not the underpant-loving Harflar - so perhaps you're still with them??

Frockfrix can be distracted with jigsaw puzzles. I think it's about time your returned.

Gill - That British Woman said...

Pat, if you get a minute pop by in the morning to see the video........however don't blame me if you're late for's another blast from the past!!


C said...

bwahahahahahaha clippy! we were on the same train of thought for sure! whilst you are among them, could you do me a HUGE favor and ask them if i left my bra there? i havent seen it in awhile. look for hammacks. 2 very large hammacks that are used for temporary sleeping quarters [or silver dollars in my case]...
if you find it, let them know that i have a full box of fruit loops i would be glad to trade with them... k?
awww, thanks.... i SO appreciate it. the GIRLS have been running loose like kids in a candy store since me accident. i need to slap them back in line soon before they start trippin over themselves!!!!!!!

merry christmas, hon!
hope its filled with lots of love and green snackies that arent too slimmy.



my word ver. is "UNBAYMA"

isnt that a distant relative of obama on his brother-in-law's cousin's side?
and i think they are from kookamunga.

Kee said...

what is in those inhalers u have been prescribed???

Ji said...

lovely poem, extraordinary cartoon, very smart post.

Happy Holidays.
just in case you want to know where I live.

take good care.