Saturday, January 5, 2008

The Naked Truth! Or "bits and pieces." ;-)

you know how you get those forwarded emails and the sender hasn't deleted all of the previous recipients' addresses and taglines?
well i got one of those from my friend the other day.
being very observant (!) and perhaps because i have possibly way too much time on my hands, i noted that one of the forwarders had included their name and job title, followed by their place of work.
to protect their anonymity I can only say that the motto of their workplace,which followed the location was. “traditional naturist values in a modern setting
hello? I thought; 'naturist'?
isn’t that another way of just saying naked (and quite naughty) people? what else can 'in a modern setting' mean i asked myself. it offers up all kinds of lewd images of people doing forbidden things while undressed. well it does if you have an overactive imagination, bear with me.
do I actually know someone who knows someone who gets email from someone who is a naturist?
upon further investigation (you may call it snooping) with a click of the mouse i was sent to the emailer's worksite website.
a site for people who don’t like to wear clothes. in public. indoors and out. and with other people. of both sexes. and all ages. and of ALL, believe me ALL, shapes and sizes.
how extremely fascinating.
i must confess, in my naivity, i've never considered this lifestyle as anything other than perverted.
uptight, narrow-minded, middle aged grandmother and mother of 3 that I am. (not to mention roman catholic and you know how we RC's feel about nudity.)
as I curiously perused the website I saw that naked people were pictured; freely enjoying the benefits of the family naturist park and its outdoor amenities. the park, i was shocked to learn, is within driving distance of my own home!!
surely not. aren't such places only in deep, dark, hidden countryside far, far away from me and all other unsuspecting innocents?
i also saw that whilst the women in the pictures had all of their many and varied "parts" on display, some of which i couldn't help feeling should perhaps not be quite so freely exposed, some of the naked men, who were not posing with strategically placed hands, or crossed limbs, and were mainly in group shots with other naked adults, looked, shall we say, rather smooth, ‘down below’. a la barbie’s boyfriend ken! a little creative photoshopping perhaps so as not to offend (titillate?) the reluctant observer such as moi.
apparently over 2.7 million Canadians agree with this lifestyle according to the website.
something else to consider; the non naturist world is referred to as ‘the textile world.’
that's you and me folks. well me anyway. i have no idea what you get up to in the privacy of your own home and far be it from me to judge you if you find such passtimes fulfilling.
i just hope, for everyone else's sake, you don't want to pass the holiday snaps around in the workplace.
some of the rules of etiquette in a naturist park include, "bathing suits are NEVER appropriate"
and "underwear should never be worn alone. when cool, naturists put on a shirt –not pants".
how positively unusual. i think i'd prefer to keep my bits warm myself but then, again, that might just be me. who knows?
well really.
I emailed my friend to ask if she knew the person who was the naturist. she did indeed, albeit not directly, and wasn't actually aware of this person's penchant for nudity up to this point of my enlightening her. i was merely doing my duty i felt.
so we then exchanged a couple of emails where we sniggered about it and said how unsavoury it all was.
then I asked her to picture the four of us, i.e. moi, my other half, her and her other half, sitting around drinking tea and chatting as we like to do from time to time…….. completely NAKED!!!
"well if future invites to your house mean I have to drop me drawers at your front door and have me bits swingin', then don’t bleedin’ invite me." was her immediate reply.
what a bloody spoilsport! :-))


wor vron said...

what was the web address............??!

Clippy Mat said...

i'll never tell!
(email you later.) :-)

Kee said...

you and pop better not make this your next vacation spot!

Clippy Mat said...

er, call next time before you come over for tea :-)